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05 March 2008 @ 12:55 pm
upset again about things -may be in my shell for awhile  
I have become very angry again about a local political situation involving development and zoning.

I don't want to get into it here for reasons I outlined in December.

Postings may be sparse here for awhile until I can replace my disgust with some attitudes that will help me keep my enthusiasm for life even though I once again hate the place I live.

I managed to survive and bounce back when I felt this way about Dayton in late 2006.

In fact, it's settled essentially about me being here probably the rest of my life. This condo was much too affordable to pass up, and the neighborhood right around it is beautiful even though the rest of the city and region is definitely going to become a huge shithole. Furthermore, my job is a good one now, with good people and ability to keep my schedule flexible.

For a man with a strong sense of place and love for places, I face a huge challenge to stay happy. -Designing a future where my PRIMARY place is an ugly city that I am hopeless about because of what its citizens are doing to it via apathy and horrible leadership.

Somehow I will craft a way of being where I can still spend adequate time in beautiful places that I feel a bond with -because I have a personality that needs this or else I feel trapped and paranoid. Then everything else good about me starts to die.

I'm too young to die now. I will make something work for me somehow.